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Thursday, July 16, 2009

Close Your Eyes...and Jump

Yesterday we had another beautiful gorgeous day and the Knight decided that a little water fun was in order.

He broke out the Slip and Slide that someone bought for the girls a while back, the one that we haven't had a chance to use yet because it was only our fourth sunny day since May (those of you in New England know exactly what I'm talking about). The three of them put their bathing suits on and I sat out on the deck to watch the fun.

The Guppy was content on splashing her feet in the little pool at the end of the slide, but we could all tell that the Mermaid really wanted to slide. Splashing in some pool was not enough for her today, oh no, she wanted to slide fast and furious!

But she was also afraid. The Knight patiently demonstrated how to run, jump and slide over and over again. The Mermaid did all right on the running start but when it came time to jump she would lose her nerve and just run off to the side.

Normally we wouldn't push her in any way, but it was obvious that she wanted to jump and slide. So finally, the Knight knelt so that he was eye level with her, and told her that she could just close her eyes and jump, and trust him to not let her get hurt. She nodded and began her run to the slide. I watched as she shut her eyes tightly....then jumped.

She slid down the slide, and by the time she got to the end her eyes were open with delight and she was laughing. She happily spent the next 1.5 hours running, jumping, and sliding to her delight.

How many times have I been in a situation where I wanted so badly to accomplish something, but one little fear made me stop or hesitate? Or worse, how many times have I found myself succeeding in my goals, but one little comment made me start to doubt myself and lose focus?

I've been feeling a lot of doubt lately. Doubt about my abilities as a homeschooling mom, about my abilities as a wife, as a person with her own goals in life. Was I just wasting my time, striving for these goals?

This doubt, this fear, has halted my progress in all my goals these past two weeks. I've become distracted and unfocused. But watching the Mermaid close her eyes and jump, watching her have complete trust in her father, made me realize that I have a Father that I could put complete trust in as well.

I'm at edge. The ride ahead looks wonderful and exciting. All I have to do now is close my eyes...and jump.
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

this is a really sweet post!
keep us informed of your jumps!