A Kiss For My Baby

I went to my appointment yesterday full of anxiety.

When it came time to listen to the baby's heartbeat, my heart leaped into my throat. As my midwife moved the doppler probe around my belly, I stared out the window and prayed.

My midwife searched for the heartbeat...and searched...and searched. She added more gel to the doppler probe and tried again. More minutes ticked by.

I became convinced that there was no heartbeat.

My midwife looked at my face and smiled. "Don't worry, I haven't given up. Don't give up yet." she said.

And then, suddenly, there it was. Strong. Reassuring. Beautiful.

My midwife and I looked at each other and smiled. And then I burst into tears.

My midwife took my hand and held it as I cried in relief. She wiped the doppler gel of my belly, then leaned over and gave the baby a kiss. I think I will love her forever for that.

Because I was so anxious about the baby, my midwife suggested that I come in again in two weeks instead of the usual four, so I can hear the heartbeat again sooner.

I slept last night with both hands hugging my baby, a smile on my face.

Thank you so much, my little belly bean, for showing me how strong and well you are.

A Kiss For My Baby